TGIF

So my actual birthday came and went but I’ve been assured “birthday treatment” through the weekend. I’m a very lucky girl. Thanks for the many birthday wishes. I was still reading them this morning and feeling so grateful to know you all.

I worked yesterday but Cristy came and took me to lunch. I was kind of bummed out – just missing Gracie and wishing I could share my day with her. I tried to hold it in but ended up burying myself in it for a while. When I got home last night, Cristy had made a beautiful dinner and I was able to just enjoy the end of my day. Crab, squash and sparkling wine – delish! Isn’t it pretty?





Later today I will attend the funeral of my old Senator when we lived where we lived before now. He was a wonderful man and I'm certain there will be tears. I didn't know him personally but he always had time for me when I was fighting Gracie's bill in the 2006 session. The first time I met him, he hugged me goodbye and I had this moment of "he's kind of like Charles Ingalls" - whom I loved dearly. Anyway, God bless Sen Mayne.


Luckily, I have some birthday money to spend so hopefully that will be part of our Saturday. That night we’re celebrating with our best girls (mine & E's birthdays) and I’m SO looking forward to that. Cristy and J get Vegas for their birthdays so we’ll see what they come up with for us. No pressure, girls.

Tomorrow I’ll be participating in a panel about the divide between Gays and Evangelical Christians after we all watch For the B*ble Tells Me So - again. I do love this movie but I think I've seen it three times this year... I’m a little torn about the discussion. I suppose most people there will have a negative feeling toward religion and Christianity and that always makes me a bit uncomfortable. I am no fan of religion but I can also see a clear separation between the two and, where I live, they just combine them and call it a day. I see it all the time. I think many of us feel like there isn’t a place for us in a church, especially if you’re looking for a bible based church. But maybe I’ll be a good voice for the ½ and ½. I think they're expecting me to be on the side of the “gay divide". But I took years of debate. I can argue both.


Anyway, I hope you all have some fun holiday plans this weekend. Shopping, decorating, treat making, card mailing…wow, I have a lot to do.

xo.

Birthday Eve

It's mine this time! Tomorrow morning, I will be thirty-seven years old! God all mighty - hold back the tears! Well, that's a bit dramatic but it does seem strange to be heading to forty.

Remember the day when you had your whole life planned? I was sure to be married at 23 and have three kids by the time I was finished being 26. Two girls and a boy. I think their names were something like "Chanda, Patricia & Christopher". Not pretty. I think they even had nicknames. Odd. They would be perfectly dressed at all times in their pinks and blues. I would have a house and a husband. (insert cough) I would be some kind of part-time movie star or talk show host - married to some kind of rock star. It was lovely. But all of the sudden I was finished being 26, realizing my life was kicking along and looking nowhere near what I thought it would be - in a good way.

That year I had been with my first girlfriend for about four years. We had started talking about having kids but (thank God) didn't do much more than talk about it. We had a house and a couple of dogs but it was one of those relationships where we were simply the only lesbians we knew so of course we should be a couple, right? Wrong. At 26, I knew I was on the wrong track.

A few years later, back on the track of beginning my life...I fell in love with the first rock star I found, got married, had a baby and thought I was living the dream. Wrong. Turns out, after watching a recent commercial she did, she knew she wasn't gay as soon as "God allowed her to be pregnant". A train wreck of mistakes and what ifs and life fell apart right before my eyes. You all know how that turned out.

Fast forward to now. This is my last day being 36. Ten years ago I was supposed to have everything I wanted but now, finally, I feel like I'm in my groove. I am exactly who I'd like to be and exactly where I fit and grow and heal and dream. I am loved wholly by the most wonderful person I've ever known and feel lucky every day for it. I have friends and family who I trust will always hold my heart and I plan and dream in a way I've never dared.

Here's to the rest of my life! Cheers!

Babies & Birthdays

So...to try another round of IVF, we would 1/2 the meds. That's the (so far) advice of our specialist. By doing so, we run the chance of less eggs/no eggs. We only got 13 the first time with just 4 fertilizing so it makes me worry. Plus, let's be real - it's damn expensive! I almost hate to try again until we have more information. I know there aren't any guarantee's and I'm not looking for that kind of guarantee but I'd like to know whether or not I'll get sick again. If so, we'll have to do another FET and our chances go way down again. Y.U.C.K.

We'll keep talking about it. We'll also keep talking about all the other options. I so appreciate all the advice I get here, believe me. If it weren't for so many of you, Kerry in particular, I wouldn't even consider IVF again. We're kicking around a million ideas but they all include a baby in the house. No matter how - and don't worry, I won't do anything illegal...we will have a solution. I'm certain of it. And I'm going to do as Nerdgirl said and start making some demands of Santa. I hadn't thought of that. :)

Onto happier times...tomorrow is a good day! It's the day that my very dear friend was BORN and can I just tell you how happy it makes me? She is intelligent and funny. She's beautiful and compassionate. She has raised incredible daughters and married an equally wonderful woman this very year. This year, I believe, is her best Ever and even though she wishes her birthday didn't exist, it exists to us and there is more light in our world with every birthday she has.

So...a day early, as not to make a fuss ON her birthday - I wanted to wish E the best day ever! I love you dearly and can't wait to celebrate you this weekend!

And after such a nice, long weekend...

back to work.

I loved having so much time off and so much time at home. The house is clean, the laundry is done and I even got to watch a couple of movies. We had a ton of time with family and friends and now I just want it right back. I can never get enough.

Some of our friends were in town for Thanksgiving so we had them over Saturday night. I haven’t seen them in a while. The last time they were here, I was with Gracie in Texas. I haven’t seen them since the ruling and their first questions was whether or not it was okay to talk about. Yuck. I tried to keep it quiet and Cristy was so great about moving the conversation in another direction.

They have a 5 year old little girl that was so fun! She went up to the nursery/spare bedroom/Gray’s room and started playing with her things. I was nervous at first. I hold that room as hallowed ground sometimes. But I loved having little girl energy in there and in the house! She and Yegs played so well together - until they crashed. He SO needs a sister or brother!

And I can hardly think of anything else. I sat at the computer for way too long over the weekend - searching sites, researching possibilities. Sometimes I wonder if it's really going to happen. We're nearing the first steps of trying again and part of me cringes at the emotions it brings. But aren't I living with them anyway? I mean, I sit here consumed at the thought of getting pregnant/getting a baby. What am I waiting for? I say my body needs more time to heal but aren't I just going to get sick again anyway? What are the chances of OHSS not happening the 2nd time? Kerry? Anyone? Part of me thinks something was wrong and they wouldn't do it like that again. My estrogen level was over 8000. Surely, something "wrong" triggered that.

& there are other options. We can lie through our teeth and adopt. It's illegal to adopt in my state if you aren't married...but living with someone & having sex. I know, odd. But that was their way of excluding the gays without actually saying it. It's a Morm*n thing. That's how they communicate. Ask Cristy's family. So we could lie and say we're not a couple. Or we could use an agency out of State and hope nobody thinks twice about where we "found" our child. It's all just frustrating and I don't know where to begin.

For now, I'll keep thinking and dreaming and wishing for a possible solution.

Post-Thanksgiving

I hope everyone enjoyed their "yesterday". Thanksgiving is always one of our favorites and this year was so exception. The whole family crammed into one room - I love it every single time.


We were in charge of rolls and yams. We let the rolls rise for 5 hours, baked 'em 17 minutes. We opened a can of yams, baked 'em 30 minutes. (the yams are not a typical dish but my favorite oldest nephew had requested them as Thanksgiving was also his twelfth birthday.) Either way, I think our food assignments show that we clearly haven't entered the realm of "grown up" yet. My grandmother and mother are still here (thank God) so everyone else just kind of follows along. I'm afraid, by the time I have to cook my own turkey, I'll be too old to figure it out.

Moving on to Black Friday...

We left Yegs at grandma's last night. He would've killed us had we made him wake at 4am to go shopping. Plus, it's getting harder to hide things now that he's eight. But it was only a plan to go at 4am...MY plan. As usual, Cristy put on a pouty face and we ended up not leaving the house until after 7am. (just kidding, baby!) We got a coffee, got breakfast and it was all over by 11:30. Fa-abulous! Of course we spent every last dollar until payday but I feel good knowing that we're almost finished. And as I sit here, I can look over and see all the wrapped presents under the tree. Peace at last.

I hope you're all enjoying your long weekend. I hope it's filled with family and friends just like ours is.

***

I wanted to quickly post a request for prayers and love for Mommies in the Making as they journey through such a painful experience. Bless'ed be. You are surrounded.

Feeling a Bit Behind in the Game

How many of you have started Christmas shopping already? Because I’m feeling behind and it hasn’t even begun. I need to get Gracie’s package ready and that always takes a lot of thought. What does she like? What size does she wear? Does she already have that movie? Is her hair long enough for clips? Does she need some fun blue extensions? Sheesh! So many things. And who knows what we’ll get Yegs. I feel like we buy him the same things over and over and just sneak a few pieces of clothing in now & then so he doesn’t notice. So far, so good. But what next? I guess I need to start thumbing through some catalogs…

So who really goes shopping at 4am? I know there must be at least one of you! The past couple of days have been full of commercials about stores opening at 4am on black Friday and I wonder who really does that? Plus, I’m embarrassed to say that I always thought black Friday meant that it was depressing or something. Cristy just informed me that it actually means a positive money day. Whatever. I'm not earning money that day so it’s still depressing, right?

I’ll be lucky to get Cristy out the door by 7am and that’s only if I have a clear plan of where we’re going and what we’re buying. I will also need a nice iced espresso mocha in her right hand and allow her to wear a hat. And even then it's questionable. But I could lie. She’d never know I didn't have a clear plan. Because isn’t it really about the rush of it all? - getting there and watching people go crazy over a towel that will just get gross after three washings? I mean, I buy things, I do. But I don’t really know what they are until I get there. Because you can see this wonderful item in a catalog but then you get there and it’s made of plastic or it’s scratchy or too dark. I like to look around – hold things. I like to know what people are buying – what’s neat! I am a voyeur, a follower. I like to see people get excited. I like to see moms with their daughters and granddaughters – when you know it’s something they’ve done together for years and years. I can hardly wait.

I wanted to pass on this new cartoon character I was sent today. I think it looks really cute and might be of use to many of you. If nothing else, the color pages are cute. It looks like a mimic of Dora but with two moms. It's full of lessons, which I like very much.

I also wanted to be sure everyone knew that HRC’s 2008 Buying Guide was released and it’s always a good reference when you’re doling out your pennies.

And if you’re interested in advertising equality in my particular state, you can also shop here on black Friday or any Friday or really any old day you want!

So there’s my push for community love! If you could give me back some good shopping ideas, I'd appreciate it.

Puke, Paint & Peace

Friday night? Not so nice. Poor Yegs. The plan was to pick him up, pick up his friend and host a sleep over. Cristy picked him up from his moms and before they left the house, he puked. Big. Again in the car on the way home and another two or three times until he finally fell asleep. The problem? It's on your "every corner" menu! He ate a double cheeseburger, fish fillet sandwich, large fry and THIRTY-TWO ounce soda after school! Y.U.C.K. So, lucky for us - (the parents that never fill his fist sized stomach with that kind of garbage, let alone that MUCH garbage) we got to clean it all up! Not pretty. This was more food than a very large man would have for lunch. And the answer? "He ordered it." Nice.

Saturday I had early plans to help a friend pick out new colors for her new bachelorette pad. Sort of. Anyway, she's newly single and moving forward! You know those days...when you want to change every little thing that ever proved that someone else lived with you? Due to my later plans cancelling, I ended up staying until about 9pm. But it's lovely. I went back again today to finish up and start on the next room. I must admit that I love people who have white walls. - but let me change them. It made such a difference in her home and I'm just praying that she still loves it tomorrow. Caramel. Yum. If I could have a dream job it would be to spend other people's money - decorating their houses when they're not home. I realize there are already people who have this job but I don't see why it can't be me. It was so fun! & tiring! But I smiled a lot and worked the muscles in my right hand so all is well.

Our weekend is wrapping up nicely this evening. Our best girls just left and we are now refueled for the upcoming week. God bless J & E. I was able to sit for a couple of hours - eating, talking and running my fingers through Cristy's hair. Perrrfect.

And just to remind you all, Thanksgiving is this Thursday! I think I just realized this! Where is November going? So gather all your thoughts and find something to be grateful for - you have just a few days to be nice to whomever sits next to you...hoping they say your name when it's their turn to talk.

The Next Generation...

Tonight I spoke to an American Government class at a local college. I do this kind of thing as often as I can but tonight was exhilarating! Nineteen kids, probably all under twenty, proved to me that they're about to change the world.

My goal was to teach them how to be involved in the political process. I told them how easy it is to lobby. Write an email, make a phone call, travel up to the Capitol and make your wish! I spoke for about a 1/2 hour before I decided to stop and ask some questions. I'm not sure why, but after reading them for a bit, I realized they were way above the kind of "easy" I was talking about. Before I knew it, we were talking about how to run for office, how to write legislation and how get it passed. Amazing.

They told ME how asking for basic rights is not asking for special rights. They told me that everyone deserves equality - that our families should recognize it, our employers should recognize it and our government should recognize it. I shared a little of my personal story about my battle around Gracie and I could see the question in their eyes. "What? How is that possible? And they tried to legislate your family?" They got it.

I like to think I was a pretty smart kid. I have always been curious about the politics in this country and I have even been known to be quite a patriot in some hoods. I voted for Reagan in a mock election in 4th grade and I couldn't wait to cast my first real vote in 1989. (I had changed parties by then) I take it seriously. I participate when asked. But these kids are for real! They are ready to go. Forget learning how to introduce yourself - jump in & change it up! It was wonderful.

I was reading one of my favorite blogs today and she talked about turning a corner into the "back in My day..." category. While I was reading it I thought, "oh, poor jbeeky, she must be Sooo old..." - not really. I mean, she is Not old. & I totally wouldn't think that about such a fantastic, amazing, young mother of two! :) What I really thought was, "I'm about to be heading to Forty". Some would say that's old. & sometimes I feel old. But tonight... tonight I felt like these kids have learned what they know from old people like me. (And jbeeky) Just like I have stood on the strong shoulders of those before me, they will now stand on mine and yours. And it felt good. I ended by telling them that because they have the "ability" to act, now they have the respons"ability" and I expect to see them put it to use.

They have my vote.

That's My Truck - or whatever.

So I haven’t been sleeping well. I think I’ve been too cold to sleep. And when I lay there awake, my head is full of a million things. I worry about situations that require deep thought. And then I try to find a solution with my eyes closed. This week I’ve pondered ways to heal a broken heart and heal a tired head. I’ve worried about my walk (& many of yours) through the upcoming holidays and what we’ll all look like when it’s over.

We had another non-bio support group last night. One of the women sat with us through her daughter’s fourth birthday. It’s the first birthday where they haven’t been together. I wondered how she did it. I watched her and waited for some kind of implosion. Heartbreaking.

I thought about how I felt missing Gracie’s 3rd birthday and remembered how painful it was. The only thing that kept me above water was my pending court case and luckily, it was almost over by then and I saw her just two months later. But this girl won’t see her daughter. And her daughter won’t see her mother. Not in two months, not in two years. She has moved to 'somewhere Carolina' and is now being raised by her other’s mother’s new husband. And I don’t know if that’s any more difficult that your child being raised by another mom - another anyone. It doesn't matter. The point is that someone else has stepped into her shoes and is taking her to school, feeding her dinner and brushing her hair. Again, my thoughts went back to Gracie.

Is there someone else caring for her in my place? I like to think it's impossible to replace the kind of love I have for her. And is it selfish that the very thought of it makes me sick to my core? I’m sitting here begging for any little part in parenting this child - a human I love most in the world and someone else can walk in, develop a relationship with her mom and take my place – just like that. And of course I want her to be loved. Absolutely, I encourage you all to love her! But when I think about it, it still hurts. That someone else could be wearing my shoes and holding my brush and baking my cake and telling my stories and dressing my barbies and wiping my tears...

And I know, some “anonymous” person will chime in and tell me that I should only wish for her happiness and that if the mother of her is happy then Gracie will benefit 10 fold. I get it. Please don’t say it. & don’t think I don’t wish/pray for their happiness and health in every prayer and every fountain. Every day and every night. I do. But you get it, right? Straight/Gay/Whatever. It’s someone else, right? Isn't there a country song that says something like, "there's some guy driving MY truck that's parked in My front yard and he's playing with MY dog"... or something? I swear it's a song. And you know who would know? The mother of her! That's who would know that song and she'll read this and think, "well, you should've done this or you shouldn't have done that..." But she hears me. As you read this, she's reading it too. And I don't want my truck back or my yard back. I want my daughter back. & if you're allowing someone else to love her 1/2 as much as I do, I simply beg you not to replace me.

I said "ever" and I meant it.

Perfect Weekend.

How nice it is to be home for hours and hours and leave only for terribly important things like a lovely high school play, dinner with new friends and lots of hot coffee!

Today was dedicated to Christmas!! & decorations! I can never have too many. So now you're saying to yourself, "there's no way she actually put up decorations..." Well friends, I didn't just do that - I put up my TREE! I think I had a tree up last year on November 1st. I waited 10 days later this year so if you're wanting to tease me, keep that in mind.

I know, I know. Everyone is bothered because Christmas comes "earlier and earlier" every year. But it couldn't come early enough for me. I love every minute of it. I don't care if I hear Jingle Bells in October. Sometimes I turn it on in August.

In fact, I sang carols as I decorated today. I tried to put on a fancy show for Cristy (leg kicks, jazz hands, etc.) during one of my favorites but then I remembered doing the same thing last year with Gracie and my smile turned to tears in an instant. It's funny how it's always right at the back of my throat. One wrong turn and it's hours to recovery. But I managed. It passed and I hung her stocking where it will hang ever year from now on. It's perfect.


So here's a picture of our masterpiece. Our first tree in our new house. It's beautiful!


And very soon, I'll blog about something like this:

"Twas six weeks before Christmas and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring EXCEPT for a MOUSE!"

Someone To Say Hi To

My sweet friend Jackie is leaving on a jet plane. Well, not really. She's leaving in her car to live a million miles away from here. Well, not really. She'll live many, many miles away and won't be back for five months. She's a military girl but don't "tell" ... get it? :)

We've been friends for 10 years and she's one of the funniest people I've ever known. She's funny in the "blond" way of funny. Now, if you're blond, don't be mad at me. Those jokes were made because of her. This is a girl who wished on a shooting star one night (eyes closed, very dramatic) and it turned out to be sparks from a chimney. This is a girl who (in trying to be very cool at one of our first "bar nights") ordered a glass of milk because she had snuck in a Reeses Cup. And when she met a lipstick girl and wanted to impress her, she went out and bought jogging suits to make her look "butch". Not a chance, Jack. I could go on and on and I'm pretty sure I even listed a bunch of Jackieisms in a book to her once...


So, she definitely entertains me but she also keeps me grounded. She reminds me where I've been and what my insides look like. She holds me to truth that sometimes I wish I could forget and she's the only person in the world that can tell me my history if I ever lose my mind. Plus, hearing Gracie say "Aunt Jackie" is one of my favorite sounds ever.

She'll no longer be across the valley but instead, over the mountains and into the flatlands of Texas. Too far for lunch but not too far for late night phone calls. So, I'll give you your song back until you come home...

From Sarah Bett*ns, From me, to You.


It's been wonderful and crazy knowing you.
And I hope that I can always see the teenage girl in you.
And I know that you'll be fine.
But I'll be there everytime
You need someone to say hi to late at night.

Better Hands

Thanks for the comments on my last post. Seriously, if I met someone who was in need of friends, I'd tell them to start a blog. :)

As I have slowly inhaled my way through the last year, many things have brought me peace. I am truly blessed with a loving family & home, supportive friends (here & in the tangible world), music & lyrics and also a very strong faith in God. Not often do I share this here but the last few days have brought music to my head that I'd like to share with you.

Do any of you ever turn on your radio and hear a song that fits perfectly in the moment? Or better, do you ask for it and happen to get exactly what you need from two or three lines of a song? It's ministry in music and I've come to depend on it a bit.

Lately, I've heard the following song often and maybe that's because it's so beautiful and everyone else wants to hear it too but I also think I hear it to remind me that I'm okay. We're all okay. And we're better off because we're here together, sharing what's right and what's wrong. It has always reminded me of Jesus - and most songs do. But today when I heard it, it reminded me of you.

We all go through so many trials with bumps and bruises that might not ever really heal. And whether we're trying to conceive and it's just one big losing battle, or we're waiting for babies coming from across the ocean, or we've lost pregnancies/babies/children while we're waiting for all of the above, or we're dealing with health problems of someone we love more than all the world...we are held so tightly among each other and stronger for it. So whether you give the credit to Jesus, your lucky star, Buddha or your best girl - it's about being held and being safe and I feel blessed so, thank you.

Here are the lyrics. If you want, listen & read as you listen. It's worth it, I promise.



It's hard to stand on shifting sand.
It's hard to shine in the shadows of the night.
You can't be free, if you don't reach for help.
And you can't love, if you don't love yourself.

But there is hope when my faith runs out.
Cause I'm in better hands now.

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down.
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground.
So take this heart of mine, there's no doubt,
I'm in better hands now.

I am strong, all because of you.
I stand in awe of every mountain that you move.
I am changed, yesterday is gone.
I am safe from this moment on.

There's no fear when the night comes round.
I'm in better hands now.

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down.
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground.
So take this heart of mine, there's no doubt,
I'm in better hands now.

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down.
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground.
It's like the world is silent even though I know it isn't true.
It's like the breath of Jesus that's right here in this room.

So take this heart of mine, there's no doubt,
I'm in better hands now. I'm in better hands now.


Before I made you in your mother's womb, I chose you.
Jeremiah 1:5

With God in your world, you aren't an accident or an incident; you are a gift to the world, a divine work of art.

Celebrate Good Times!

It's Wednesday night and I'm about ready for bed. This blog has been terribly boring of late because I have simply been consumed with elections. Well, it's over. I'm happy to say that we came out very well. We have an amazing new Mayor and two amazing new councilmen. And almost as big as that, school vouchers Failed! :) Yesterday was a good day. Mostly.

Yesterday there was an op-ed written to my city's newspaper. It was written by a man from Arizona whom I've never heard of. He's aligned with the organization that represented the mother of her so you can guess that he didn't speak very highly of me. He, of course, said that it's not possible for me to be a parent to Gracie - we're not "related". And that if anyone thought I was, they must also think that it's fine if a "live-in boyfriend of seven months or so" claims right to someone else's child. I could go on and on about why this is so absurd. I could scream the facts at him. I could tell him that I picked our donor to fit MY characteristics. I could tell him that I went to every prenatal visit. I never missed a single doctors appointment. I sang to her, bathed her, fed her and rocked her and now she's not seven months old - she's SIX. Six. But I don't need to tell him any of this. It won't make a difference. He doesn't see me. I have hate inside me for this man that I pray will go away. But still, nothing hurts me more than this part:

"The issue was not denial of visitation to an 'aggrieved parent,' but instead was sleight of hand to advance an agenda that seeks to redefine the family until it has been reduced to meaninglessness. "

I am sick and tired of bad people saying this is all just part of a grand agenda. I'm sick of them acting like my entire goal was just to dissolve the "natural family" or ruin marriages for all my hetero friends. I'm sick of it because it distracts from what this did to my daughter. It leaves her name/her person out of it and that's when I can't just sit by and listen. Instead, I'll respond. I'll call him a liar (without using those words) and I'll tell you here that we need to stand up and say they're wrong. We need to let them know that we fight for our babies because we love them and we're obligated to do so because we made promises before they were born.

There were over fifty comments after what he said. Most of them were people who thought just like him. Most of them could not understand why I would try so hard to take a baby "away from her mother". But I never did that. I would never do that to my daughter or anyone else's daughter.

That's what THEY did. They took my daughter's mother away.

Don't pretend to know me and my agenda. She has always been the only reason. Always.

Get OUT and Vote!

Come one - Come all!
It's your obligation!

I'll be out tomorrow - campaigning my little heart out. My hope is that those of you who read here will feel terribly pressured by this reminder. I like to think most of you will vote no matter what you read here but just in case, here is my plea.

Please, oh please - get out & vote today.

Walter H Judd said -

"People often say that, in a democracy, decisions are made by a majority of the people. Of course, that is not true. Decisions are made by a majority of those who make themselves heard and who vote - a very different thing."

If you think you won't make a difference, you will. I promise.

SO ready for Bed.

The weekend is winding down and, partly due to the time change, I was ready for bed about 3 hours ago. Seriously, I have the hardest time with "Fall Back". Great that we get an extra hour but does it make everyone else get into their pajamas at 5:45pm? Dark translates to "bedtime". And it will be my bedtime just minutes from now.

The past few days have been full of good times. After work on Friday we went up to the cabin. Our best girls watched Molly Tomato so we could have a mini mountain retreat with the family. We left the very minute we got off work and enjoyed every minute of it. All the kids spent time exploring, climbing, 4-wheeling and staying up way too late. We spent time sitting and stretching and sitting some more. Lovely.

Yegs & my favorte first nephew

Same amazing nephew with his best grandma & My favorite 4-wheeler

Who could shoot this sweet mama?

I'm learning the "deer whisperer" moves of my dad

This dad was brave enough to come up but had his little guy wait behind. See him peeking?

Cristy and my mom, lounging in the sunshine

And this was all that Yegs had left on the way home

We came home Saturday in time to meet some other blog families at a local bounce house. The kids seemed to be having a great time and we had fun meeting people and talking to those of you we've loved getting to know better. I forgot my camera or I'd totally be exploiting all of you. My guess is that someone else took pics so you'll see the action elsewhere.

And finally, later that night, after Yegs went to his grandma's to eat too much junk food and watch grandma approved movies, We Went Out! We went to a trashy bar and watched the amazing Hells Belles. They're an AC/DC all female cover band and even though I'm not a big hard rock fan, they are incredible to watch. And did I mention there was a girl with a guitar? In dreadlocks? & a black bra? Have I told you lately just what that means to me? She was ... well I just can't even explain it. If they come near you, see them. You won't regret it. (& incase you're questioning my hard rock integrity, I only wore my ear plugs for about 3 minutes) Someone vouch for me. My guess is that most of you won't believe me...

Today has been nothing but undoing Halloween, resting and drinking too much coffee. I think I might have a "too much smoke at the bar" hangover. Or maybe it was my pre-bar Brigham Ade, my beer at the bar or my "cheers" with E over a kamakazi. Three drinks and I'm out. And that was over 3 hours. Cheap date? Yes.

Happy Monday ladies. (& gentleman)

Tagged...and I got right to it!

NerdGirl tagged me for a meme.

For this meme I must post Six Random Facts/Habits About Myself that I Haven’t Already Posted. This is hard. What don't you know?

1 - I suppose I can admit here (not at home) that I'm a control freak. Cristy assumes that it's just about the remote control but that's just how I diffuse it. I have honestly had no control over my life these last few years and I'm certain she'll feel the effects of that until the day I die. Or she dies. You get it. Don't tell her.

2 - I eat cereal. A lot. Without milk. I hate cow milk. I put my cereal in a bowl like a normal human but I don't add cow milk or any milk. Cow milk is from cows and that's just gross.

3 - Speaking of odd eating habits, I love sunflower seeds. However, I've never figured out how to eat them without using my fingers. I don't understand how you can divide the shell and only eat the part that doesn't leave slivers in your tongue. What are you - magic?

4 - I've never waxed my eyebrows. & I don't pluck. I tried plucking once and I thought I might die. So I recently decided to get my upper lip waxed because I'm certain I saw some kind of shadow. I . thought . I . might . die. Seriously, I've never felt more pain. If I can save one of you, it will have been worth bringing this up. Don't wax your lip. Wax all your under parts, wax your brows but God save you, don't wax your lip.

5 - I sniffed a whole peanut up my nose. Don't ask.

6 - I used to fall asleep and try to dream that Michael Landon was my father. This doesn't say much for my pa. I mean, my dad. But it was more about living the life of Laura Ingalls - Prairie and all.

So there you have it. Did you really know any of this about me? I've stumped you, I can tell.
So who's next? I get to pick THREE of you!

KJ - because she hasn't nearly exposed herself enough
MM - because she's the funniest girl I know (no pressure)
& KLG because those babies aren't keeping her very busy these days :)

Big love to you all!