Wednesday, February 21, 2007

I Am Re Mad

I am so mad today. I feel like my skin in crawling and there are needles in my head. I feel picked on or so much worse than that. "Picked on" sounds like someone laughed at me because my shoes didn't match. What I feel is so much bigger.

There are two kinds of people in my life right now. Those that are cheering and those that are tip toeing. Both are making me furious.

Senator Bell said that Friday's ruling was a "marvelous decision". How is it possible that someone would really say that out loud? I mean, even if they thought that lesbians were bad and that I didn't deserve to have children, wouldn't you at least be thoughtful about the child? & knowing that, as gay as I am, she will suffer?

& then there are those that testified three years ago. I can barely even go there right now but I am RE mad! I realize you've apologized. You've even taken back your testimony but you know, what if one little thing you said stood out to one of those Justices? Just one little thing? All the forgiving I've done over the last three years has gone out the door. No matter the reasons you think my relationship ended, what does that have to do with my daughter? I don't care if you were mad at me or just wanted a little piece of the action, what you did is written in stone somewhere in the third district court - and way down deep inside me.

And those of you that are tip God, please don't! Be sad for me. Cry yourself to sleep for my child and yours. Scream to every paper and every neighbor! Be disgusted that an entire group of children have lost the security of knowing they'll never lose a parent even if the dynamic of their family changes. Be angry and willing to voice your concerns during the interim THIS YEAR! But don't tip toe. No one will hear you.